The snow turned into rain
Dec. 24th, 2007 09:05 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
axesladeSo I'm sitting here downloading (for free!) the first volume of Hellblazer, and thinking...this is the first time in about three years I've actually be...if not happy, then content around Christmas.
Anyone who's kept in close touch knows why the past two Christmases have been tough on me. A whole buncha crap going on and confusion and ugggh. The funny thing? This Christmas is worse. I have no one, fucking NO ONE around.
But you know what? that's okay. Because unlike the last two years, I know why. And the knowing makes it easier, for once. Am I happy about it? Hell no. Do I wish I could make all the things keeping me from these people go away? You bet your ass.
But, for once, knowing the truth helps. I'm not worrying that I hurt somebody. No, it's just life. And, while it sucks, it makes it a lot easier to handle life.
So, yeah. Alicia's okay right now. I'm sure that'll change when I go back to school, but for right now, things are okay.
Anyone who's kept in close touch knows why the past two Christmases have been tough on me. A whole buncha crap going on and confusion and ugggh. The funny thing? This Christmas is worse. I have no one, fucking NO ONE around.
But you know what? that's okay. Because unlike the last two years, I know why. And the knowing makes it easier, for once. Am I happy about it? Hell no. Do I wish I could make all the things keeping me from these people go away? You bet your ass.
But, for once, knowing the truth helps. I'm not worrying that I hurt somebody. No, it's just life. And, while it sucks, it makes it a lot easier to handle life.
So, yeah. Alicia's okay right now. I'm sure that'll change when I go back to school, but for right now, things are okay.
