He reckons I'm a watercolour stain
Jan. 23rd, 2006 12:13 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I think there’s so much emphasis on pushing things away, instead of pulling them out of the closet. A lot of times I just notice that people try to hide their dirt for as long as possible. Monsters, dirt, whatever you want to call it, the stuff that you censor and that you don’t really want to share with people. I think you can only do that for so long before you start losing your mind. I’m finding a lot of freedom right now in just looking at things that I really feel. We’re not encouraged to do that, and I think that that’s what makes people sick inside of themselves. You kind of want everybody else to think that you’re okay. Well, you’re okay if you have monsters! That’s what people don’t understand—everybody has many many voices going on inside of themselves.Now there is one voice, though, that is more of the ringleader, more of the innermost voice that isn’t trying to beat you up, or trying to make you feel like you can go slaughter 67 people and it’s okay. You know, the voice in there that goes, “hang on a minute, Tori, we’re really feeling lonely right now.” That inner inner voice is, to me, the most important because it can start being a bridge between all these other voices in your head. Everybody has them.-Tori Amos
I was having some chats with that voice and the others this morning. Listening to Boys For Pele, mostly Father Lucifer, Blood Roses and Caught a Lite Sneeze. The songs that really came out of wounds, or drugs or darkness. Y'know I think I'm really getting this one Tori quote...
I've always said that Lucifer understands love better than anybody. You know he's done a mean tango with Greta Garbo a few times. Really understanding love is the only way you get to the dark side of things.
I think that's so true. Lucifer, or whatever you want to call that dark force, he/she/it really GETS love, gets passion. I mean, you have to have something besides bright and cheery to truly feel passion, to get other people. You can't understand what makes someone else tick if you're white (as in pure, joyful, etc.) all the time. If you love someone, you're going to meet their demons once in awhile, and you've gotta be able to talk to them. You can't say to them 'stay down, stay hidden, write it down or something but keep it away from everyone else' NO! You can't do that, it just doesn't work. And if a relationship ends and you're feeling so low, you can't ignore that anger. You can't go 'well, this is an illogical, wrong emotion. It's wrong to want to hurt so-and-so, so I won't voice it'. You posion yourself when you do that, you have to give into that emotion. You have to go into it, talk to this dark place and understand it. It's always going to be there, but if you speak to it you won't be so afraid.
Wow, that was deep for a Monday....
I was having some chats with that voice and the others this morning. Listening to Boys For Pele, mostly Father Lucifer, Blood Roses and Caught a Lite Sneeze. The songs that really came out of wounds, or drugs or darkness. Y'know I think I'm really getting this one Tori quote...
I've always said that Lucifer understands love better than anybody. You know he's done a mean tango with Greta Garbo a few times. Really understanding love is the only way you get to the dark side of things.
I think that's so true. Lucifer, or whatever you want to call that dark force, he/she/it really GETS love, gets passion. I mean, you have to have something besides bright and cheery to truly feel passion, to get other people. You can't understand what makes someone else tick if you're white (as in pure, joyful, etc.) all the time. If you love someone, you're going to meet their demons once in awhile, and you've gotta be able to talk to them. You can't say to them 'stay down, stay hidden, write it down or something but keep it away from everyone else' NO! You can't do that, it just doesn't work. And if a relationship ends and you're feeling so low, you can't ignore that anger. You can't go 'well, this is an illogical, wrong emotion. It's wrong to want to hurt so-and-so, so I won't voice it'. You posion yourself when you do that, you have to give into that emotion. You have to go into it, talk to this dark place and understand it. It's always going to be there, but if you speak to it you won't be so afraid.
Wow, that was deep for a Monday....