(no subject)

I'm really getting worried about myself.

Had a freakout to my mother last night, but I think it made things worse more than releasing the tension.

Everything sounds like work, even things that are so fun.

I...

....

I'm scared of getting help for a lot of reasons. But I don't know how long I can go on like this and still hold it all together.

Fuck.

Because I'm bored

( Itunes memeage )

(no subject)

So, after that angsty post, things that have made the day (so far) pretty awesome:

-Wearing one of my suits out and about (the big thing, really, making me pretty sure that the clothing garbage is what flipped the switch in my brain from 'blah' to 'pits of despair'
-Writing 600 words already today
-Only having to be in math class for five minutes since teacher was sick
-Tied to that, getting my math exam back and finding out I got a 100 O_O

Now, hoping work goes better today so I can write happy tonight.