File under: things that should be common fucking sense

[axeslade]

The statement I had to make yesterday at my appointment that seemed to confuse the NP

"I'm bisexual but I don't have sex with men." [not exactly how I said it, but, meh]

Reasons I do not get why this screws with people:
1. I have only had one sexual partner. By default, at this time, I do not have sex with men.
2. Do we question people's heterosexuality when they're virgins?
3. Attraction does not have to equal action.

There's also the fact that were I to ever have sex with a man (trans or cis, though cis are obviously the only ones she was referring to since it was more a question of 'could you get pregnant any time while you're taking this?'), it *probably* wouldn't be penis-in-vagina.

I'm all up in ur kinsey scale, breakin' it.

But seriously. Why is it *always* when I say I currently only have sex with women, it's assumed I'm a lesbian? (This was before I voiced the gender stuff--though I'm sure she still would have gone there anyway, urgh). Can't we, as a society, just go 'oh, you have sex with ---' and not try to label it? Please?

(Also, the assumption that I would rather save a clump of cells than my sanity was kind of insulting on a different level, but meh)

Comments

Drive-by comment

[badbookworm]

It might matter how you put it. If that's *exactly* how you put it, I think "I'm bisexual but I *haven't* had sex with a man" would cause less confusion.

Just as "I'm lesbian but I don't have sex with women" might cause confusion, but "I'm lesbian but I haven't had sex with a woman" would not.

Re: Drive-by comment

[axeslade]

I think it's still problematic--people will still ask how I KNOW I'm bisexual if I haven't had sex with men. (I've used that phrasing, too, and, yeah it's caused the same problem). Belgh, society and your quaint little categories.