axeslade: (Default)
A most peculiar mademoiselle ([personal profile] axeslade) wrote2006-09-24 04:38 pm

I QUIT!

*sigh*So, I've spent a good chunk of the day looking for publishers to send queries to just so, if the (very likely) case of Kunati rejecting me comes true, I can send out more queries right away. But...Goddesssssss....

It hurts. I wrote a romance. But all the romance publishers, or publishers that take romances as one of many of their sub genres, all require stereotypically happy endings. Which mine isn't. At risk of giving it away, someone dies. But it's still a happy ending in it's way. Think...for lack of a better comparitive, for those who have seen it...it's like when Angel died in Rent. It's a necessary death. But the romance publishers don't want that. So. What do I do? I label it differently, which is hard to do as it is a romance or general, and general...maybe it's a drama, but it's romance/drama and...ugh. Or, I change the end. Which...I can't. I just fucking can't. Or I rewrite it as a screenplay, which I suck at. Sigh. I....I want to scream I QUIT! to the girls, tell them to abandon me since I'm hopeless, but then I think of being withou this...this curse, this gift....and I want to die, because without it I'm hollow. So...for lack of something better to end this post, I quote Rent again.

From What You Own

MARK
Don't Breathe Too Deep
Don't Think All Day
Dive Into Work
Drive The Other Way
That Drip Of Hurt
That Pint Of Shame
Goes Away
Just Play The Game

You're Living In America
At The End Of The Millennium

You're Living In America
Leave Your Conscience At The Tone

And When You're Livinging In America
At The End Of The Millennium
You're What You Own

ROGER: The Filmmaker Cannot See

MARK: And The Songwriter Cannot Hear

ROGER: Yet I See Mimi Everywhere

MARK: Angel's Voice Is In My Ear

ROGER: Just Tighten Those Shoulders

MARK: Just Clench Your Jaw Til You Frown

ROGER: Just Don't Let Go

BOTH: Or You May Drown

[identity profile] lifebytes-yaya.livejournal.com 2006-09-24 11:40 pm (UTC)(link)
=) =) i love that song too
i love all the songs
meep!!

you will get published one day!!
i knowz it!!

[identity profile] axeslade.livejournal.com 2006-09-25 01:01 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I'm definitely checking out the soundtrack when I go to the library tomorrow. ~_^ (provided it's in, both copies are out right now).

*sigh, hugs*Thanks honey.

[identity profile] lifebytes-yaya.livejournal.com 2006-09-25 10:29 am (UTC)(link)
your welcome

[identity profile] safilix-shark.livejournal.com 2006-09-25 01:42 am (UTC)(link)
Label it as Womens Fiction. It would fit. A lot of WF has a very powerful romantic subplot. And after all, the story is mostly from Mandy's POV. It would work I think.

[identity profile] axeslade.livejournal.com 2006-09-25 01:52 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, but they generally still desire happy endings. *huff*Don't mind my rantings. The house was just too hot for me to try to work so I got testy. *sigh*

[identity profile] axeslade.livejournal.com 2006-09-25 01:53 am (UTC)(link)
oh, btw, did msn totally die on you again?

[identity profile] spacequeen.livejournal.com 2006-09-28 01:18 am (UTC)(link)
Don't leave us or the writing behind just yet. ;)

[identity profile] axeslade.livejournal.com 2006-09-28 03:36 am (UTC)(link)
Even if I wanted to, the ladies won't let me ~_^